It Is Time.

It's been six days since I last blogged, but the ideas have been spinning in my head all week. The last few days of the Conscious Parenting Summit took up my available computer time, and then parties and gatherings seemed to occupy the rest of my days. I am itching in my seat to write about the interview I listened to on the final day of the summit (on circumcision!), but it deserves a blog all its own...another day for sure!


 Last night I almost caved.

I've been on a raw foods diet for 20 days now and I feel like overcoming last nights cravings were a milestone for me. I had decided while we were at the market to "enjoy some of this cheese with you (my fiance) tonight and then that'll be it for cooked food". I convinced myself that one, nice, romantic, delicious, new, cooked food would be okay for me and I would be fine hopping back on track.

I had been reading and hearing about this new Daiya Cheese Block for several months now...ever since the Daiya brand was introduced about 2 years ago, the vegan community has helped it spread like wildfire. It is the answer to our gooey, stretchy, melty, durability concerns of many other vegan cheeses. I don't think I've ever met a vegan cheese that I didn't like, after all, I've always loved cheese (more on that in another blog some day). But Daiya cheese has been the answer to this girls prayers...er, dreams.

So, Daiya cheese company recently created this cheese wheel that is supposed to be like the perfect vegan "serving cheese". It comes in three flavors and are a reasonable price. My mouth has watered at the sight of them since they arrived, but yesterdays passing glance on the store shelf did me in.

Hours later, after much deliberation as to how it should be eaten; should it stand alone or with a partner, should it be melted or room temp, should it be mixed into a pasta-type dish or sliced with an apple or cracker, and it went on... I finally decided on raw chocolate ice cream. And just like that, I sideswiped this potential road block! Whew!

I fully realize that this is not the greenest meal choice,
but it got me out of a potential crisis quickly,
and it's still really healthy!

I am doing this raw self challenge as a way to remind myself that I AM what is most important in this world. Not the food on my plate, or the art on my walls, or the car that I drive, or the private school that my daughter won't attend. I am doing this to become happier and healthier and clearer and more in tune with my body, my feeling, my being.

This is probably the most evident part of my lifestyle, my diet. I am already vegan, for almost 9 years now, and vegetarian for around 15 years. I have dabbled in raw detoxes every few months, for one month at a time, for the past 3 years. I love the way I feel while on it, but then I always go back to being a healthy, homemade vegan afterwards and the benefits I had noticed while raw slowly slip back into oblivion as I put more and more cooked food into my body. None of this happens abruptly or drastically, so change is never noticed until it is gone. And then one day, I am sitting like a lump on a log, sunk deep into the cushions of this broken, 30+ year old couch, feeling fat, lazy, boring, blah, and overall not mindful, and I realize "oh shit, I'm back here again...".

I hate those moments. They are so depressing. I feel like I am staring up a rickity old well from a long forgotten time, and the only way out is dependent on me, myself, and I. Ugh.

Well this time around, the decision to go raw was a much more pleasant one. Yes, I had a few pounds I wanted to lose. Yes, I was feeling like I needed an energy boost and some mental clarity and peace. But mostly I did it because it felt like the right time. This isn't gonna be something I'm even going to try to describe, but something just said, "it is time", just like Rafiki the baboon from The Lion King...

The stars were just aligned I guess. It felt like everything was pointing me in that direction. The two final blows that shot me into space were the raw journey presentation put on by Lisa Sobolewski of JUSTFOOD and the documentary I AM. I saw Lisa speak with some of the HMN girls one evening in May and then cuddled up with my fiance, my cats and my notebook that evening to watch the Netflix that had just arrived that morning, I AM. Both experiences deserve a blog of their own, and I'm pretty sure I already discussed these in a previous post, so I won't repeat myself. But either way, this was the push I needed...and off I went.

I've mentioned themes before, and how I notice themes-of-the-day or themes throughout life. I also notice a shift in these themes and how they seem to be narrowing down on a particular energy. Sometimes I can read these shifts and take the challenge, like going raw for example, I feel like it is so much more than just changing my diet. Again, this is hard to describe, and even though I am earnest in my efforts to be as honest as possible, regardless of how I may be perceived,  I frankly don't have the words to explain some things.

So, the fact that Ada woke up just in time to drive to the raw presentation, the fact that she remained happy and playful during the whole two-and-a-half hour talk,  the fact that she then went to bed so easily (never happens...refer to blog titled Cooling Off. Cooling Down) and didn't wake up until the wee hours of the morning, the fact that the dvd finally arrived after months of me wanting to see this documentary, the fact that I had dinner in my belly and a happy partner by my side all panned out for a perfect evening to watch the movie. It was all meant to be and it all just made so much sense, upon reflection.

Trailer for I AM documentary

Anyone else noticing a theme among these blogs? Self reflection. Learning to look at my life, my decisions, my energy, my health, my happiness, my knowledge, my spirit and trust me first. This is, after all, what this blog is all about for me. It is my journey to becoming clean, green and soulful. In every sense of the words. You'll see...this is something I try to do with every action I make. I fail miserably a lot. Not kidding. But somethings I gradually get the hang of. Others fit like a well worn cardigan, as if it was always my truth. I am working on fine tuning my understanding of my goals and life missions, and in turn validating who I really am, and to never be ashamed of who you are. Punches fist in air!

I do hope that you continue to join me on my journey, and to pop in for a visit every now and then to see what I have been up to, what I have learned recently, how my life has changed, and how my family is growing...

If you enjoy what you read or find something of interest for further reading, feel free to bookmark my page, sign up to receive my blog emails, write about me in a letter, mention me on facebook, pin me on pinterest, tweet about me on twitter, photo me on instagram, or whatever else fits into your particular lifestyle or desire.

My ultimate goal is to spread love and knowledge, perhaps something that may never have crossed ones path until today? You never know where you will learn new things or encounter something or someone who will change your life forever. Don't be afraid to have those moments.

Jump In. Feet First. Now.

pictures from the past week...

Daddy came home on his lunch break and  she said "Dada"!
Second word!

Singing sweet songs, of melodies pure and true...

One of her favorite things to play with, my measuring cups.

I get up to top off my tea and my seat it taken when I return.

She's not too happy about this dress, no matter how cute she looks it in!

Helping put away the dishes after dinner

Bag of Java Gold, compost manure

Playing in the grass

Broke my tea pot, so these impatients now have a new home

Hanging out in the Ergo while I garden

Bedtime stories with Daddy

"Just because" flowers for Viki from my garden

Personalized baby pillow for my little one made by a dear friend

She smiled for the camera :)

Such a shame she's not a happy baby...

Trying out her new playfloor

Checking out the nature wall Mama set up

A Penny in the plants

Passenger seat nurse...she's decided my sunglasses aren't necessary.

Little lawn chair for my little one

Fresh picked flowers from my garden in vintage vases

Mentioned: Java Gold, Ergo baby carrier, Daiya Cheese, JUSTFOOD, HMN, I AM documentary

HAVE A SUNSHINE DAY!

"Everything is connected everywhere at all times"
~The Mirrored Neuron concept